frog in the well....

thats what i feel like now.

Whilst i'm worrying about little things in life there are many things that are happening at the same time, and much more stuff that i cannot even imagine to know.

For example just today i flipped through a copy of Vertigo (which i used to think was full of crap).

And i learnt about Radioactive zones and Hydrocephalus.

I'm sure that many people may say, "you only found out today!?" or something like that, but its not that im stupid or anything... i've just been absorbed and learning other things in my life.

Whilst learning new things makes me think that i'm just a green girl and ignorant of what happens around the world...
i love how i feel after i have integrated the new knowledge into my life.

Two months down the track...

I find religion is a fascinating topic. Marx says : religion is the opium of the people. *smokes/sniffs/does whatever it takes to get it in my system*
Religion makes me believe and do wierd things~ woo, i'm on a high... lalala...
An interesting discussion that i was so fortunate to be a part of, addressed the question whether Politics should be separate from Religion. *this actually sparked from the US Bush*.
It continued on to cover religion with its compatibility to modernity, democracy especially. The case study of Iran popped up but after further discussion, the article used to support the case was dismissed as a minority report and thus the arguement came to a halt.
Why are all religions so gender bias and promote male dominance...
Oh mother earth, forgive us foolish humans with our false airs of arrogance our reverence of other humans... i shall always and only remain a humble servant to you~

Australias purpose in Iraq

On Sunday I cut out an article, which I only got around to reading today.
It was titled "Haunted by fear of Iraqi ambush". It was basically of a Corporal who served in Iraq for seven months and his thoughts on western; or at least Australia's occupation in Iraq. He has thoughts that run along the line of, "Why are we there? Why did I go there? " and "I don't think we should be in Iraq. I sit there and look at it and think it's all civil war now and we're just getting in the way."

I myself don't understand why Australia is still in Iraq. So I search up wikipedia. (good ol' wiki. Like an uncle that knows about everything and won't hesitate to share the information. )
Here goes:
Starting off, was the Invasion of Iraq led by the Bush Government with an objective of disarming Iraq of weapons of mass destruction, to end Saddam Hussein's support for terrorism, and to free the Iraqi people. After Saddam was overthrown, an attempt was made to establish new gov. regime's which failed, leaving Iraq in a state of turmoil , many countries withdrew their troops.
2003 - Saddam captured
2004 - Iraqi Insurgency
2005 - Election for Iraqi government, U.S announcement of withdrawing troops is canceled as suicide bombers tore through the country.
2006 - civil war ensues, Saddam is executed.

Well.... that didn't give me an answer, instead has filled me with more questions.
Why didn't Australia withdraw when the other countries did?
If America had not interfered, even though it would mean Saddam was still ruling Iraq, would it have been better for the country?
I mean from what I know, i don't think weapons of mass destruction was ever found. With the plan to attempt to 'free' the Iraqi's, instead has backfired and have thrown the people into a living hell.

Hmm...
You know what i think?
Damn those who make it their business to stick their noses into everyones else's business.

Gods promise?

Today two ladies came around to our front door to spread the word of God. He has made promises to free the world of suffering the tell me.
I don't intend to be sacrilegious but i have many questions as a young person that i would like answers to.
God will make blind people see, disabled people walk, bring the deceased back, enrich the soil with grain. God will bring all suffering to an end.
But I wonder.
To whom did he make these promises to? Are we expecting too much from God, or is he as they say, all giving. When will God start fulfilling these alleged promises?

We all wish for a world where no one suffers. However if no one suffers, how will one then know what true happiness is? How will we know when we are blessed?

All this talk about God has freshened my memories of a documentary i watched a while ago.
It spoke of man playing God by taking control of nature. Thousands of years ago, nomads began harvesting their food, forcing plants to grow in foreign soil. Civilizations began to grow. Humans since then have been consumed by a need to control. To control time, control growth, control other humans.
Disputes began by conflicting humans. Wars erupt. Lives are lost. The cycle continues.

I could go on. But today i neither have the time or will to continue. Funny how in a world where most tasks can be completed at astonishing speeds, we can still manage to run out of time.

First entry

What can i say, first entry. Starting off is always difficult, or so I heard. Here goes.

I have a new partner called gym. We met up a couple of days ago and I think we're going to go steady, given that I've already invested a sum of money into our relationship. Sometimes i ask myself was it really necessary to commit to gym? All the other times i congratulate myself for taking that first step towards a better me. It must be a mental thing but when i look into the mirror now, I think I look somewhat trimmer than before I joined gym.

In uni this semester, i've taken up french 1, japanese 5 and comparative social change. French is the first European language other than english that i've attempted to learn, and so far, its impossible to get the mouth formations and nasal noises to produce the correct pronunciations.
Being placed in Jap 5 is also a big bum. Apparently i am qualified for it since i did japanese extension for my hsc, but my instincts and brain tells me otherwise. Now i wish i truly had spent the time to learn the language properly instead of preparing for exams according to the syllabus. No more learning by rote, and hopefully i'll still pass with flying colours, fingers crossed.

To be honest, i was lookin forward to taking comparative social change, thinking the subject would allow me to initiate intelligent conversation and make me sound smart. First and second tutorial has piled my brain cells up with loads of new terminology that a young, so called intelligent person like me should be aware of; if i had paid any attention to what happens around me and the world. Unfortunately, up until now i've immersed myself in historical romances which only depress me further, knowing my own love life is and i dare say will never be as good as the bestsellers. So why do i continue reading?


Last year, i had no social life at university whatsoever. I basically went to uni, went home, sat on the computer with the hours flying by, and never actually got anywhere in life. Heck, i even skipped more than half of my lessons. Surprising how i managed to pass, and even get a couple of distinctions. I wish i had gotten hDs but even if i did, i never would have felt like i deserved them.


Hopefully my dear blog will track my attempt to improve myself as a person, provided i am consistent of course.